No use trying to fight it, you’re an eight-sided die, a d8. A fine
example of simple elegance, the d8 is one of the least appreciated
types of dice, and is often neglected. You are known to be quiet and
shy, outward traits that conceal viscous sarcasm and mean wit. You are
very smart, yet wise enough to hide your intelligence the quicker they
found out how smart you are, the sooner they’ll put you to work, which
is something you can do without. People call you dark and pessimistic,
or moody and cynical. You find little point in arguing.
Me? Dark and cynical and evil? That’s ridiculous! Oh well, I guess I’ll have to kill them all.